Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow

  

This weekend's adventure was to the Long Mynd in Shropshire. I picked up Max and stupidly handed over the driving to him. I soon came to regret this only 3 minutes into our journey, when he nearly careered into the back of another motor because he wasn't paying the slightest attention to the road ahead. Needless to say, his rubbish driving didn't improve as the journey went on. 

Our first stop was to Gregg's just outside of Leominster, as Max was hungry. Despite specifically requesting a non-vegan sausage roll, he bought me a vegan one anyway and tried to palm it off as meat (I think he was under the impression I'm as stupid as him. I'm not). I have to admit, the pretend sausage roll was actually not bad, although it was disappointingly cold and I would've preferred actual meat. Apparently vegans can't purchase meat because they will lose their souls to Satan himself. They are silly people. 

While munching our food stuffs on the road, and with Max doing a terrible job of eating a phoney steak bake and driving, we continued our journey up the A49. We drove through the dire town that is Craven Arms, and it wasn't long before we turned off at Little Stretton. From here, we made our way to Church Stretton and started our ascent onto the Long Mynd. 

The road is slightly treacherous, being barely wide enough for one car, and with a steep drop on one side. You are also advised at the beginning that it is a 'Weak Road'. Max is also weak. 

As we traveled higher up, we were eventually entirely enshrouded in cloud. While this was quite cool and slightly creepy, it also meant we couldn't really do anything now we had arrived. If we walked too far from the motor we couldn't find our way back (we nearly got lost just getting out for a fag), and we also couldn't see what I imagine is an incredible view. We did, however, stumble upon one thing that made the journey worthwhile - snow! Admittedly there wasn't much of it left, but I had a great time kicking the remains of a snowman at Max to make it look like it was snowing. Only an idiot would let someone kick snow in their face. 

After the excitement of the snow, we carried along over the top of the Long Mynd and down the other side, and eventually out of the clouds. We briefly stopped at the 12th Century Myndtown Church, and were immediately baffled by the sign on the door, which stated that the church was closed due to coronvirus, but that it was unlocked for anyone wishing to enter. I get the impression the Vicar of Myndtown is slightly stupid.

After realising we had come on yet another utterly boring adventure, we decided to head for home. However, we had one more stop to make on our journey - Tuffins of Craven Arms. My dedicated readers amongst you (Mother and Father Salsbury), will recall we visited Tuffins on our previous adventure to Clee Hill with our chumly Emma. A veritable treasure trove of delights, Tuffins is not to be missed on any trip up the A49, and is the only decent thing in Craven Arms. After Max stocked up on vegan treats, we finally headed for home.

I would recommend a visit to the Long Mynd if big hills are your thing. On a clear day the view would be awesome. And there are also wild ponies bimbling about the place (not that we saw any of them). And don't forget to drop into Tuffins if you're driving through Craven Arms, it's like Aladdin's piggin' cave.

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